5 Science-Backed Ways To Tap Into Inner Strength & Cope With A Crisis As A Highly Sensitive Person(HSP)
My sweet girl is resting easy in her dog bed and I’m so grateful.
But a few days ago, it was a different story. She was panting, digging and pacing and couldn’t get comfortable or keep anything down. Her eyes said “help me”.
Three trips to the vet and 36 hours in emergency care, she is finally back home with us. But the dark circles and swollen eyelids still linger on my face. Questions hang in the air about what caused this. But we’re so grateful to have her home.
It’s been a whirlwind of emotion, silent prayers and sleepless nights.
As a Highly Sensitive Person (HSP), going through this crisis rattled me.
When stress hormones kick in, the amygdala, or the part of the brain that creates fear reactions, is super activated (Source). Your heart pounds so you’re ready and able to sprint away from danger. The brain is on hyperalert so you can react at a moment’s notice, but that also gives you trouble focusing and remembering things (Source). All this is useful if you’re the roadrunner being hunted by the coyote in the desert, but not if you’re trying to navigate a health scare.
Here are 5 science-backed strategies that helped me survive this crisis and that will help you manage your mind and tap into inner strength.
1.Take notes or write about what’s happening. Writing activates the prefrontal cortex, which triggers feelings of relief and reduces brain freeze. Your panicked brain has limited working memory. That’s what makes it hard to hold two thoughts in your mind and to recall important details. As we saw Zuzu getting sicker, I pulled out my pad to write out her symptoms, and to track her drinking, eating and peeing. My paper and pen stayed with me through every talk with the doctors so I could tell them what’d occurred and write down every impression and next step in her care plan. Writing the plan down eased the burden on my working memory so I didn't miss any details. I felt calmer talking to the doctor about her test and exam results.
2. Have a good cry. When you cry, you release stress hormones and feel-good endorphins. Worry and fear washed over me when we returned home without Zuzu. I talked about my fears and cried with Adam and then my mom. More tears fell in the shower and then again at 4:30 a.m. in the morning. And eventually I’d released all the emotion and was done crying.
3. Focus on being grateful. Practicing gratitude boosts your resilience during stress. Gratitude activates your prefrontal cortex, which connects to parts of the brain involved with emotional regulation and stress relief. It’s not about denying or numbing what’s happening. As I let the tears fall, I thought about all the reasons I’m grateful for Zuzu. When my first marriage ended, she opened my heart to love in a new way. She is a special little soul and one of the greatest gifts of my lifetime and for that, I will always be grateful. Leaning into my love for her in the middle of this crisis provided comfort. And as she heals and returns to herself, my memories of these days are of the intense love I was feeling, rather than of my fear. I’m not as scarred by the experience.
4. Predict a positive outcome. Optimism boosts your dopamine, which increases your courage. My brain started imagining what I would do if she didn’t make it through, as a way of preparing for the worst. But there’s no benefit to this line of thinking. Catching myself doing it, I rewrote the story with a better ending and felt braver.
5. Accept physical comfort from loved ones. As an HSP who has spent a lot of my life trying to hide my sensitivity, I’ve done a lot of holding back tears until I got in a room by myself. I had to learn to let the tears fall in front of other people and to accept physical gestures of comfort. Hugs, holding hands, back rubs and cuddles. Holding hands and cuddling increases relaxation and lowers anxiety by releasing oxytocin. Let yourself feel comfort by receiving nurturing touch from loved ones.
Essentials for coping with a crisis as an HSP
No matter what happens, you can get through this.
As an HSP, you have an active amygdala which increases your fear reactions. But you can soothe this automatic reaction.
Calm your anxiety and relieve stress by activating your prefrontal cortex through writing, optimism and gratitude.
Let the tears fall, release stress and activate feel-good endorphins. Feel your feelings and get comfort and support from your loved ones.
Always remember, you have everything you need within you.
You’ve got this.